Couples who experience miscarriage have few moments where they don’t have some sort of reminder that they are childless; whether it is a commercial with an adorable little chubby cheeked baby, the insensitive or oblivious comment from a stranger or the pitiful look from friends and loved ones. We hope and pray for a pregnancy and to lose it later is devastating. We have to actually experience grief to be able to move forward. We must feel the pain and the sadness that comes with the loss and face the reality of what we have lost. So how do you find peace or joy during the grieving process?
It is imperative that couples communicate with each other and be mindful that they are on this journey together. It’s OK to tell your spouse that you need to put it in a box, close the lid and forget about it for a while. Make those moments happen and share them with each other. Find something mindless to watch on TV, dive into a book that can take you away, watch a silly light hearted movie or go out on a date (choose a place that is child free). You may not be able to shut it down for a long period of time, but take any time you can and enjoy being with each other.
Though you will survive the loss it is not something you will ever forget or never revisit. It is a major part of what defines your life story. Just remember that you are not alone and remember the blessing you have in your partner.